Without You Forever
by Child of Gallifrey
Summary: Kel has lost the man she loved. How can she go on without him next to her? How will she cope not seeing him again? R&R -One Shot-


**Hello. So this is just a one shot. I own none of the characters. Some of the words are from songs. Grace is Gone by Dave Mathews Band and What Sarah Said by Death Cab For Cutie. Hope you enjoy.**

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The chapel walls gleamed in the sunlight. A young woman walked in clothed in black. her hazel eyes lost their shine. Kel walks forward. She sits in the front with Neal and Yuki. She stares at the coffin ahead of her, her eyes dark.

_He looks so small. How did this all happen? _She wonders staring at the coffin. Kel thinks back to her last moments with him.

Flashback

They had been standing at the edge of the Royal Forest talking. He looked at Kel with bright eyes. She smiled at him. He lifted a hand and caressed her cheek.

"I'm so glad I found you Kel." She closed her eyes and inclined her head towards his touch. He leaned forward to kiss her. Movement in the trees behind Kel caught his eye. The archer drew back his bow and aimed at Kel.

"No!" He yelled and threw Kel out of the arrows paths. It landed in his chest before Kel knew what was going on. He keeled over gasping. Kel caught her lover in her arms. Tears streamed down her face.

"Please, no, please. Don't go." She pushed back his dark hair. "You can't go please. I need you. Please it's only an arrow. Fight it please fight it." It was no use. The arrow had plunged its way into his heart. He looked up at her one last time.

"Remember Kel, I love you. Forever." And then he was gone.

End of Flashback

_I could've saved him_, she thought barely listening to the people and priests talking about the one she loved. The one who died in her place. _The arrow was supposed to be for me. I was meant to die. Not him. He died for me and now he is gone. I was helpless when I needed to help someone._ Kel watched as the priests set his coffin on fire and watched as the flames rose higher and higher. _This is it, _she thought. _He's gone forever now. Never coming back. _Kel left the hall with Neal and Yuki. Her eyes were dry. She hadn't wept a single tear since that last day with him. She knew she would never be able to love someone like she loved again. _Dear Goddess, _she prayed, _take my eyes, take my heart, I need them no more. Never again will they fall upon the one I so adore. _

_"_Kel!" She turned her heart racing certain she heard him call her name, but there was no one in sight. She thought she saw him in a window reflection but again there was no one. She was supposed to be dead and hauting him not the other way around. Yuki noticed her friend jump at nothing. She knew what Kel was seeing or thought she saw. Yuki could do nothing for her friend.

"Kel love. He will never leave you. Know that Kel, he will always love you." Yuki placed a hand on Kel's shoulder. She just nodded and walked away.

Kel made her way back to her chambers alone. She sat on her bed and stared into space. Nothing made any difference. He was gone and that was all that mattered. He would never come back to her.

Six months later

People said that her grief would ease but to Kel each day seemed more harder than before. For weeks after the funeral she wouldn't eat, wouldn't sleep. Just lay on her bed staring at the ceiling willing him to come back to her. Lalasa had had to get help from Yuki, Neal, Thayet and Raoul to get Kel to at least eat something.

"Please Kel. This is not what he would've wanted. Please Kel eat something for him." Raoul pleaded with her one morning.

"How would you know what he wanted? He's dead." She screamed at him. Raoul stood. He was fed up with Kel's behaviour. She was acting like a child.

"Don't go thinking you were the only one who loved him Kel because that is not true." He roared and stormed out of the room. Kel sat in silence thinking about what her ex-knight master had said. It was true. He had touched many people's lives and she also knew she would never be the same with out you. Kel got up and dressed. She walked in silence towards the graveyard. Here were headstones and plarks for all those who had fought for Tortal and had died not necessarily in battle. She knelt in front of his one. It simply said:

_Sergeant Domitan of Masbolle._

_Much loved friend and son. _

_Died in the place of someone he loved._

_Gods all bless_

Kel stared at his stone for a long time thinking. She thought about her time before she met him. Kel thought that if she could go back and change things so she would never meet him and never have this grief she wouldn't do it.

Kel leaned towards Dom's stone and whispered, "I knew that you were a truth I would rather lose then to have never have lain beside at all. I love you Dom" She kissed his stone and left the graveyard.

Alone in her room Kel looked at a portrait of Dom. His blue eyes were bright staring back at her. She got up a placed his portrait in her desk out of sight. _Maybe one day,_ she thought,_ one day when his face isn't the first thing I see when I wake up. One day I might listen to the sound of snow falling and not hear his footsteps on the ground. Maybe then I will take his portrait out again. Maybe then._

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**So i hope you enjoyed that. Please review. **

**For some reason i enjoy writing sad stories. Might write more**

**Tell me what you think. XxX**


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